I Am Tired To My Bones

I am tired to my bones
But thank you Lord cos I have bones and they are not broken
Not one

I am covered in sweat and grime
But thank you Lord cos the home I have been cleaning is mine
All mine

My back hurts and I think my feet are swollen
But thank you Lord cos it felt good to clean my house my way
All day

My hair is still a mess and my nails even worse
But O Lord, thank you for the hope of tomorrow. As long as you give me life. I can fix all that. Tomorrow

My 2012 was not really as I wanted it to be.
But then again, my 2012 was much more than I thought it would be. So thank you for amazing me. Still.

My children still get on my nerves sometimes.
But, come on, Lord, thank you, I HAVE children to grate on my nerves.
To love

My mgm and I are in  love/strangle relationship
But thank you PapaGod for our love trumps our desire to strangle each and every time!
All the time

I have not seen my sister and my brother in way too long and it hurts and I miss them
But then again, I feel them daily in my heart and that is closer than any plane ride can get me!
And it's free

*sighing and exhaling* Dear Fathermine, I am so tired, tired to my bones, even in some parts of my heart. YET, there is room, always room for thanks.
To You.

Yes, I am tired. To my bones
But I still have enough left in me to DARE TO BELIEVE  that what is behind me cannot hold a light to what is before me in 2013! And that is balm for my tired bones!

Way Maker, Do Your Thing

First of all PapaGod, thank you for giving me peace about my tomorrow. It has not been easy but I am getting better and keeping my peace about the future. I am grateful.

Thank you too for this door that you have caused to open for me. I was really surprised but then again, that is how you are. I brag on your name and appreciate you from the bottom of my heart. Papa, since you are the one doing this thing, could you please perfect it and make it easy and stress free. I don't need to tell you about the finances of this home right now. You know all about it so having to walk through this door you have opened will take some doing. YOUR doing. So please, Way-maker,  do your thing. Do what only you can do. Show me that you are God in my life. In Jesus name, I am asking you.

That is really all I have to say about this. I am going back to chilling. Cos I promised not to fret about tomorrow. As you well know, if you don't do your thing, this way you have made, I will not be able to step into it. So PapaGod, my life is in your capable hands. As for me, I just want to be the best me in YOU for my family and myself. To the glory of your name.

Love you Lord but thank you for loving me way more.

Help me Understand Lord

Dear Lord, My Father

I need you to help me understand
Why? I prayed for her yet she died.
Ms. K, the little girl died yesterday. Lord, why?
Hmmmm, Lord, I know, you are Kabi o kosi.
You are the I Am that I AM
Who am I to question you.
No matter what you are the God of the Living
So please send forth your comforter to her family
Her Dad. Her Mom. Her Siblings
Lord But why?
Our friend J too, just died like that yesterday morning
His wife, his children? Lord who will take care of them
Yes, you are right, you will. Yes, you are ABLE
I thank you Lord, cos even as I count on you to help me understand
I know I can also count on you to take care of I and the children.
Yes, even though sometimes I do not understand a whole lot
I understand that YOU can be TRUSTED
SO yet will I praise you Lord
In Jesus Christ Name
Amen!